Praise for My Books


"Manreet Sodhi Someshwar is a gifted writer of great promise. I have a gut feeling we have a new star rising in Punjab's literary horizon. She has an excellent command of English and a sly sense of humour."
- Khushwant Singh on The Long Walk Home

"An enjoyable tale of a sassy girl's headlong race up the corporate ladder."
- India Today on Earning the Laundry Stripes


Showing posts with label USA. Show all posts
Showing posts with label USA. Show all posts

Tuesday, 24 January 2017

Womens March On NYC


Sadda haq, aithe rakh! 

Give me what’s my right, right here, right now! Rhythmic, rousing, pithy and propulsive, it was our rallying cry as we pounded the pavements outside the offices of a college Principal or the Superintendent of the Girls’ Hostel. Our demands were simple: no diktat on what clothes we could wear, no 9 pm curfew by which to return to our rooms, no discrimination between students, girls or boys …

Three decades later, today, I was back to pounding a pavement and raising rallying cries. Only, the pavement was Fifth Avenue, Manhattan, I was pounding it with friends, yes, and my daughter in tow, and our cries were in English.

Not my pussy!
Can’t build the wall, hands too small!
Hey-hey, ho-ho, Donald Trump has got to go!





You get the import, don’t you? I have journeyed across years, crossed oceans, traversed continents, and travelled from the third world, presumably, to the first. And yet, my fight with patriarchy continues. 

And my question, as that of my sisters, remains the same: Why are you so obsessed with my uterus?


Wednesday, 9 November 2016

Namaste


Two auburn oak leaves crisscrossed at the stems, a steaming mug ensconced within - the cheery sticker on the green-coloured door announced Fall. After dropping Mehar at school, and brisk-walk-alternating-with-jog in Central Park later, I had taken to stopping by Starbucks for coffee. Twin odors of baking and coffee were what I associated with America, from when I had first arrived on a consulting assignment. I joined the line of caffeine seekers and scrolled down my Twitter feed. Oonagh’s tweet - Okay universe, let’s do it one more time. #NewDay - made me smile.

Pumpkin spice latte. 

Mmm… that sounded delicious. I looked up. A high school girl - she could afford the calories. 

With cream, yes. 

Bingo. 

When my turn arrived, I asked for a tall pike and waited.

"You speak such good English!" 

The woman behind me in the line seemed genuinely appreciative. So I decided to return the compliment. "As do you."

The woman was surprised. "But- - of course, I live here." Emphasis on "live".

She was stocky, blonde, blue-eyed, with a washed-out complexion that hinted at Teutonic origin. In my track pants, I was not making any fashion statement. I had been mistaken for Latina before, grocery boys at Fairway hailing me with "Hola"; blinkered Japanese tourists chasing deals in Century 21 had taken my brown skin for a store helper’s. But I had also figured that in Upper West Side one could get around anywhere with their business - ferrying children, pushing strollers, buying groceries - in sweats and none batted an eye. I made myself taller and smiled. I was prepared to enjoy this conversation. "As do I."

A quiver of consternation across the woman’s forehead as she attempted to navigate the conversation without appearing intrusive while being exactly that. "I meant I was born here. I’m a native."

One out of three New Yorkers was immigrant, which was indeed reflected in the spectrum of faces and languages I saw and heard daily. So the woman was clearly not from the city.

"You are a New Yorker?" I asked as she waited for the tall Pike to arrive.

"No, I’m visiting."

A Midwesterner, likely. I had encountered that particular American variant: polite, white, quarantined from the salad bowls of West and East coast cities."As am I."

The woman seemed to relax visibly. Her smile returned. “That's what I meant. You look," she searched for a word, shrugged, "exotic."

I tilted my chin, an imperious shorthand for "I see". 

"How long will you be here?" 

Perhaps the Midwesterner in New York assumed every non-white was a tourist. "Oh, I don’t know, a few years."

"Years?"

"Un-hunh."

The server arrived with my coffee. I scrolled to the Starbucks app on my iPhone and flashed it at the reader. Taking my coffee, I smiled at the woman and proceeded to the counter for Half and Half. As I stirred in the creamer, I noticed the gentleman, pants darned at various spots and the same frayed check shirt, in his spot by the tall window, nursing his coffee and reading a book. On occasions, I would bring my laptop along for change of writing location. I had observed him for several weeks now. He seemed to come daily, and spent hours with one coffee. Private school kids, posh Mamas, corporate executives, handymen, NYPD cops, elderly retirees - I had seen them all in that Starbucks store, a microcosm of the variegated city. 

As I headed to the door, the woman caught up with me, a grande cup in her hand.

"If you don’t mind my asking," she said, as if the conversation was ongoing, "where did you move from?"

"Hong Kong," I said.

"Oh! I thought you looked Indian." 

The woman was dismayed with the disordering of her mental picture. And I was getting tired of the inquisition. "Yourself?" I asked.

"From North Dakota."

"Then you must speak Dakota."

"Excuse me?"

Just that week Mehar was working on a lesson on Native Americans in the US. Browsing through her seventh grade social studies book, I was intrigued to learn the connection between the Native American tribe Sioux and Dakota, a linguistic sub group, which in turn gave the state its name. To me, Dakota meant Fargo, that atmospheric film with its pregnant police chief protagonist, surely a first. "You said you were native, so I assumed."

The woman stiffened visibly. "I meant native English speaker."

"Sure." I wagged my head. "And did you know India has twice the number of English speakers as England itself? Have a good day!" A wave, and I strode off. 

Seriously!

Of course, I spoke English. I also spoke Punjabi, Hindi, some Urdu and Kannada, and part-comprehended Gujarati and Bengali. And that tiresome Midwesterner? Not even a smidgen of Spanish, I was certain. Despite the fact that there were more Spanish speakers in the US than in Spain. 

A storm of tweets rose in my mind as I planned to unleash them, Trump style.

English not a foreign language for Indians who'd made it their own & given it a generous dousing in garam masala #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

Next time you go to the gym, lounge in your pajamas as you watch a re-run of Avatar, shampoo your hair, remember #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

Next time you wear those Khakis, fancy yourself a tech guru, or a media mogul, remember #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

All those words, and more, we Indians lent to the English language. Remember #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

English became the world’s language coz it borrowed from wherever it went: Arabic Chinese Italian Polish Persian #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

The French have a council that is official authority on French. The English created no borders for their language #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

English embraced others & absorbed from them. Its mantra for success? Stay open, stay flexible, stay alive #NothingNativeAboutEnglish

Ah! Feeling like I could out-Trump Trump even, I swiped my phone and tapped the blue bird, all set. Ahead, to my right, a door swung open and a man made to exit. Somebody hailed him from inside and he hovered in the doorway, neck craned back. Behind him, I sighted a row of people in sweats, arms extended skywards, necks retracted, before they straightened, lowered the arms and folded them in front of their chests. The group was in sync with a tutor who faced them, lithe and graceful as she bowed her head and said something. In unison, the class sang. 

Nahm - as - tay!

I glanced at the board atop the shop front: Upper West Side Wellness Through Yoga

The phone had gone to sleep mode, my right thumb hovering over the screen. I pocketed it, took a long sip of the pike, and smiled. 

Twitter aside, there were other ways to win the world.

Namaste.


© Manreet Sodhi Someshwar

Friday, 27 February 2015

A Character Certificate for a Greeting

A new place disorients, to begin with. If it didn’t, how would it be new? Eight months into a city that is home, for the nonce, I continue to be surprised when the language I speak isn’t the same as the language of other denizens of this city, despite both being curiously labelled ‘English’. Hmmm. Is it a minor matter of the pond coming in the way, you know, the Atlantic? British English versus, you know, American English? (On an aside, why do Americans use ‘you know’ like a comma, using it to pause very now and then, instead of, you know, actually pausing to collect their thoughts?)

I am trying very hard to not dish out my character certificate every time I am asked: How are you? Usually, when greeted thus, I answer: I am very well, thank you. How are you?

However, I realize that the greeting is not really a question of enquiry, more a shorthand for ‘Hi!’ So, my long answer isn’t what folks are expecting exactly. It’s also impractical because by the time I finish answering, the queue behind me at Starbucks is curving around the street corner. So, I observe others to see how they solve this conundrum. An upward toss of the head, a not-quite smile but a stretch of the lips, and a brisk, “Good. Yourself?” Ah ha, there! Economy, efficiency, the hallmark of America, at least of this city.

I linger around to hear if anybody answers that greeting with “Bad”, or better still, “I am bad”. No. None. Each person is intent on stating his/her certificate of goodness upfront, securing the coffee and striding off. 

Months on, and I am still resisting. I don’t want to be good today, not-so-good another day, or seriously bad one day. Besides, whose interested? The greeter is being polite. I have truncated my reply to “Very well, thank you. And you?” But it’s still too long, for the transaction at hand - Starbucks server, building concierge, school doorman - requires a two-second social lubricant, one which any non-standard response can derail. “Say that again?” 

When and how did a greeting become a call for a character certificate? 

Curiously enough, when Americans are not being good, they can be caught declaring ‘they’re bad’, rather, ‘their bad’. First person: My bad. Which is bandied around as substitute for ‘my apology’ or ‘my mistake’. I am gobsmacked. ‘My bad’ is indeed very very bad: grammatically incorrect and oh so inelegant. 


But you have to give it to the Americans - at least they are consistent in their obsession with declaring their character at the drop of a hat. There, I slipped in my little British English idiom, as fusty as the Queen herself but when you’ve grown up listening to BBC as the standard bearer of English, it’s a little hard not to be pernickety. As even Bollywood certifies, angrezi padhdi git mit tu kardi, jinvey queen saadi Vic-to-riya …

Any examples of Americansims that have bamboozled you? Please do share, right here!